ShadowRAM: July 18, 2005

Just the other day at the supermarket, yours truly was thumbing through the bible—OK, fine, it was People magazine—only to see former Cisco exec Keith Zubchevich prominently featured. He recently married Nancy O'Dell, the in-my-opinion-slightly-scary host of "Access Hollywood." Zubchevich is now with Riverbend Technology.

We also hear that former MicroAge/current Tech Data exec Bob O'Malley sold his Paradise Valley house in Arizona to none other than former Vice President Dan Quayle. The O'Malley-now-Quayle abode reportedly is 5,800 square feet and sports six bedrooms, five baths and an outdoor bar. All this for a mere $1.95 million.

Speaking of stars, Microsoft struck out not once but twice with the Artist-formerly-and-once-again-known-as-Prince.

For its big partner event in Minneapolis, Prince's hometown, the company tried to persuade His Purpleness to perform at its closing party Sunday. The price was too dear, so the B-52s played instead. Then it came out that Microsoft's British subsidiary was all set to host its partners and media at a party in Prince's Paisley Park studio. All systems were apparently go until word came back from Prince's people that no meat could be served. What?! A new venue was found. Mad cow or no mad cow, those Brits want their protein.

Top Microsoft sales guy Kevin Johnson was all wound up for his Saturday morning keynote at the partner conference. Maybe a little too much for the groggy crowd. He took some shots at rival software powers that can't seem to get their top dogs to attend partner events.

Cases in point: Sam Palmisano, who missed IBM's PartnerWorld this year, and Larry Ellison, who can't seem to make it to the partner day component of OracleWorld. (Then again, Larry's been known to phone in keynotes from yacht races in other hemispheres, so maybe he doesn't have time for partners or customers).

At any rate, Johnson was on a roll: "I understand some of our competitors can't get their CEOs to their partner meetings. When our execs go AWOL, we'll find them ASAP," he said, cutting to a video showing various Microsoft luminaries including CEO Steve Ballmer being administered remote electric shocks. "Nothing says 'Get a move on' like 675 volts of gentle persuasion," Johnson joked. Needless to say, Ballmer was front and center the next day. It was hilarious, no question.

Well, actually there is one question, Kevin: Where was Bill? No sign of Mr. Gates in Minneapolis. Maybe he was with Prince.

And, finally, star VC firm Kleiner Perkins has added another big name: None other than former Secretary of State Colin Powell.