ShadowRAM: May 31, 2004

It became obvious quickly on Monday that the show network was locked down. There was no access to VPNs and limited access to instant messaging. Some Web sites were out of bounds. Fine and dandy, unless you actually needed to work. Exhibitors, attendees and reporters fought hard for the few key open hardline connections in the hallways.

There, a wireless LAN,meaningfully dubbed Wild West,also worked, albeit sporadically.

Microsoft techies finally admitted they shut down relevant ports to prevent exploits. One said 8,000 attacks had been launched by Tuesday morning and that someone on-premises had tried to launch a worm, to no avail. A Microsoft exec later said hackers offered a $50,000 reward for whoever penetrated the network,a pittance compared with the millions of dollars Microsoft has put up to track down the Sasser and Mydoom authors.

Meanwhile, in Las Vegas, Computer Associates veep Russell Artzt bragged to CAworld attendees that his company was "chosen by Microsoft to be the security solutions provider for Tech Ed." A video during Artzt's keynote featured Microsofties talking up CA's security expertise and mentioned the press-room connections as part of the challenge.

I know this stuff is hard, but seriously, what good is a secure PC if you can't get your job done?

Also at Tech Ed, Microsoft fliers recruiting new "regional directors" blared a big "The Apprentice.net" tag line. Can no one stop this incessant Trumpmania? Also, Hewlett-Packard, IMLogic, Sybari and Microsoft ponied up a royal blue 2004 MiniCooper to give away to the lucky schlub who happened to get the right key.

Speaking of lucky breaks, Andy Bratton, sales veep at Arrow's Support Net division, can't stop gushing about his recent life-changing experience at the Broadmoor Resort in Colorado Springs, Colo. After an Arrow meeting, some execs decided to squeeze in nine holes before dark. As the light faded, Bratton scored his first-ever hole-in-one. Wanting to share his good fortune by buying drinks at the clubhouse, he found it empty but for the bartender, who was happy to hear the tale. At checkout the next day, the receptionist congratulated Bratton on his ace. He later he got a personal letter and certificate from the club president. Bratton cited this world-class customer service.

Upon hearing the tale, IBM Global Financing exec John Callies said the Broadmoor was probably so intent on anticipating every need that it probably had an employee lurking in the brush to rush unseen onto the green and drop Bratton's ball into the cup.